Sunday, July 9, 2017

Forcing the Force of Forced Gratitude

Forced gratitude.

Sometimes just taking energy we feel like we don't have
and forcing ourselves to look at things differently can save our sanity....

        ...For example:

  • I'm grateful for my ridges, freckles, patches, and scars; they mean I survived something enough that they could be formed and worn there, as badges of achievement and survival that others get to see (and as wrinkles develop they, too will be badges of the same).... 
  • ...Or heat sickness; it demonstrates that while my body cannot tolerate and regulate heat and my circumstances aren't helping, at this moment it is because I got to see water and sky, and life being lived in plants, flowers, trees, and insect and animal life, for a brief moment as I was able to pause and spend a few minutes in a garden near a pond.... 
  • ...Or all the things reminding me I'm grieving, one piece at a time, be it physical, mental, emotional, etc.; each is a chance to remember that there have been things and people in my life worth grieving, living or otherwise, and the gifts of living that that represents.... 
  • ...Or it being 3 hours early and already feeling like it's time to fall asleep; it means my body is trying to take care of itself, regardless of my wishes, but for my benefit....
  • ...Or that sharing things like this isn't always as easy as it seems, and sometimes I feel stupid, foolish, and/or scared; it means that my desire to help others in similar situations understand they aren't alone, and maybe help someone know they have a source of connection and information, if they want it enough to speak up, is more powerful than my desire to shut up, and give up. 

        It isn't easy, and it feels pointless and Pollyanna-esque sometimes, but it means I'm using a life-saving tool which can change my life - and those of others, sometimes - if I make it a habit, though it is out of my comfort zone. A perfect stretch! Those kinds of turn-around things can at least keep our minds searching for the light, rather than just cursing the darkness. Even the mere rolling of the eyes which can occur when some of us consider trying can be helpful, because it means there is a sense of humor deep inside that is willing to at least let near that little spark of light. And that alone can be enough to at least get us from one, little step to the next.

         Better days ahead, my friends!

©The Phoenix and The Butterfly

©The Phoenix and The Butterfly

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