Walking a Mile in My Own Shoes

        Welcome to Monday, folks!  We're becoming truly summer, where I am!  Whether the weather is hot, cold or anything in-between, I hope you find things to appreciate, this week!

        And, welcome to Week 20 of my "Motivational Mondays" challenge!

"The shoe that fits one person pinches another;

there is no recipe for living that suits all cases."

~ Carl Jung

And Christine follows her insightful comments in the section by asking:

What does your shoe look like, and why?

        Oh, goodness, Christine Morgan, you have me thinking, this week!

        "Everyone has a different path to walk in life, and therefore we each need a different shoe.  Looking at another's shoe won't help you figure out what you need to be wearing."

        This is a rather tough subject for me, so bear with me, folks.  I grew up in a life that led me to believe the opposite of what is being said here; I'm not trying to blame "them" for anything, mind you; but despite my learning better, I still feel tugs at my psyche, whenever I find myself needing to walk a mile in my own shoes, so to speak.

• Do you realize, my friends, how much power you often wield when you try to sway others toward your opinions? 
• Do you know just how much you might affect someone who is vulnerable to suggestion? 
• Do you feel the responsibility you earn, if you convince another to bend their wills to your own, even though sometimes that bending and twisting might deter them from their true potential, based on their own personality and deepest desires? 
• Do you know just how difficult it can be, for a person who feels a tugging at their heart, to be or do something that is contrary to the wishes of others they respect and admire?
• Do you see how this applies to any and all within the realm of your influence, including your significant other, children, students, or others?
• Do you even care, if you feel that your beliefs of "right and wrong" override any excuse, explanation or "right" that person has to think and act for their self, or that you think their desired choices are a mistake they'll regret later?
• Do you demand your own way for yourself, if others try to do these things to you?

        

"What does your shoe look like, and why?"

        Hmmm....what does my shoe look like?  

        I have always been a bit..."different".  It always seemed like, no matter the group, I felt as though I stood out like the proverbial injured digit, never quite fitting in with my peer (age) group.  Even now...I'm not exactly "normal" for my circumstances (which you might have noticed by now), and I've pretty much accepted that it's just not gonna happen.  And that's okay.  The more I learn about life, the more clear it becomes to me, that at least part of the time, everyone feels that way.  We're all looking at the world through the lenses of our own experience, and we don't always see the same "normal"...so the definition of the word is subjective, and not factual...which means that we aren't going to be, unless we realize how those "shoes" we wear are our own, and not going to be carbon-copies.

        To put this into the metaphor...

        Think of it, for a moment, like shoes (because that's the way one uses a metaphor...but this isn't English class...ahem).  We aren't exactly born into the shoes we'll wear as adults, and we're not even born into shoes that are like anyone else's, even.  As we grow, we grow out of the shoes we were in to begin with, and we continue to shed the old, as we grow into the new.  

        By the time we are adults, we have a pretty good idea what shoes look best on us, and what shoes feel the most comfortable.  We're pretty lucky if we can find a pair that look good, fit well, and feel comfortable!  But while we tend to get into our habits and stick with what we feel comfortable wearing, sometimes even changing shoes to fit different situations, the longer we wear them, the more they have a tendency to conform to our own foot shapes and methods of movement.

        What do I mean by that last part?  Well, ever look at your actual shoes, after you've worn them for a year or so?  They don't look new; they are usually shaped more like your feet, as the contours of your feet push against certain areas of the shoe, til the shoe materials form to you.  They also scuff and the soles wear in some areas, but not others; we tend to wear down the areas where our walking and standing push hardest, especially if we drag our feet when we walk.

        Some people have a lot of different kinds of shoes, and don't like to choose one, specific pair.  Others tend to go with a pair that fit any and all occasions, if possible.  Some are more comfortable in shoes that really stand out, while others tend to be more conservative.  I'm not sure if you've ever, actually looked around at the shoes of those you pass every day...but I've done it, and actually, it's really interesting to see how one's shoes reflect one's personality and way of fitting in with the world!

Come on, PB; but what about your shoe?

        Mine would likely be a lot like the shoes I wear, actually.  Fairly simple, comfortable to fit my needs, but with respect to the situations in which I wear them.  Most of the time I have to find shoes that allow for things like adaptive inserts that allow my feet to work properly and without as much pain as would be without them.  That means I'm not likely to find fad-fitting ones, but that's okay, because I was never one much for fads, anyway.  But I do have some that fit my more formal situations, more or less.  

   

        As far as "my shoe"... pretty much the same thing.  I'm not completely afraid to not fit in, though I prefer not to stand out, entirely, unless it's for a good reason.  I prefer to be sensible and pragmatic, and try to do things in the perspective of The Grand Scheme of Things, even though in the moment I sometimes struggle with the way I fit in a situation, so I have to accept that sometimes I'm just not going to be comfortable, regardless of the propriety or expectations of the situation.  Sometimes it isn't the shoe that doesn't feel a good fit; it's just the who or what I am, which means that sometimes, I have to accept that things aren't going to fit as comfortably as I'd like, simply by the nature of myself, and my life.

        Of course...sometimes, for people, it's just the nature of shoes, and life, in general.  Sometimes it's the nature of whether we accept or reject the kind of shoe we were taught was "correct".  Sometimes it's ... eh, that's enough ... you get the idea! lol!  I'm not going to beat this to death, my friends.  But it does give me something to consider, this week!

        Better days ahead, my friends.